Skip to main content

Sundays

There was a time when I waited for Sunday. After a week of work, and I worked hard, a day of rest  was very welcome. I loved to sleep.  I am not an atheist, and I go to church maybe once a year for  midnight mass on Christmas eve. So I'm not a churchgoer basically. Therefore Sundays did not mean  that I was seated in the pews in church listening to the pastor's sermon.  The pastor, in fact,  would not recognise me until my sister, who goes more often to church, introduced me as her brother  after Christmas Eve mass. I also had a problem sleeping and would lie awake at nights trying desperately trying to fall asleep. I tried counting sheep and it never worked. I also tried those sleeping videos on YouTube. I listened  \ and felt bored. They were not music I was familiar with and they kept my eyelids firmly apart. Even a safe  tranquillizer that my doctor prescribed did not have any effect. The on...
Post a Comment

Middle Distance Again



There is a middle distance one stares into when the mouth opens slowly and the jaw drops to the chest contentedly. There are many moments in life when this happens. There are some who are very gifted in the art.

The head drooping also occurs on public transport in Kolkata. While you hang onto the bus handle as the man behind you pushes forward with his paunch and the chap to your left treads sadistically on the little toe, the person sitting on the right seems to go into a trance. You look at him fiendishly and wipe your brow for the nineteenth  time. The man remains thus even when you are unceremoniously ejected back onto the street.

Then there are others who stare out of the bus windows at nothing in particular, except when their eyes alight on a pretty woman. You cannot mistake that look. It is the middle distance gazer at his best. He is unperturbed as you sway and get pummelled by fellow travellers as the driver tries to think he is in a grand prix.

It’s not much different in the office. But then you are not standing on your toes. That is an advantage. Then you come to notice that some are the wilting kind.

I have seen a person sitting up with the back upright and with one finger on the computer keyboard. Since the person sits with the back turned to me, I fail to notice that Morpheus has happily taken over. 

Only when some other employee brings this to my notice sotto voce that I can do something about it.    

But I have to do it in a soothing voice for a sudden bark can bring on a nightmare for the person who will then ensure that I get a court summon.

I take a few deeps breaths, listen attentively to the whistle that the sudden air sucked in makes, stop myself from choking and give a loud sniff.

The person to whom my attention is directed stretches, closes the left eye and stares unblinkingly at me with the right as I get a hiccup. Someone rushes to aid me with a bottle of water.  I sprinkle a few drops on my pate to slake the thirst. Then I let out another hiccup.

A kindly soul slaps me vigorously on the back making my eyes pop. A loud hiss escapes my lips as my  eyes water.

"Oh! He's choking!" someone says with genuine concern.

"You needn't call an ambulance or a hearse," I gasp, "I've to collect my pension and provident fund first and say goodbye to my cat."

Meanwhile, the person who almost sent me to My Maker, looks at me with interest.

"Is he choking?" she asks wonderingly.

"Forsooth!" I utter mentally, as I give her a weak smile.

"He's all right," a colleague says darkly.

"Got to go to the washroom,"  I gasp.

I stagger to my feet, stumble and fall, all in one fluid motion.  I keep staring at the middle distance as someone says, "He is pissed ... er ... passed out after all!"




Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Sales Talk

I was trying to be polite to the online salesman. "It's not what I..I.. ordered," I stuttered in agitation. "But Sir, it's the best brand, very long-lasting and very comfortable," he said in a persuasive voice. "That's not it, it's, it's ....," I tried to interject. "We can send you another one, should you want one," he said pushing his point. "Another one...?" I asked, not liking where this was leading to. "Yes Sir, or a couple or even a dozen," he said persuasively. "A dozen...? " I howl. "You could even order two dozen Sir," he said smoothly. "What would I do with two dozen! .....Two dozen,  for god's sake!," I shriek. "Laying in a nest egg Sir, for the future, Sir," he said. "Are you a banker," I ask confused. "No Sir." "Then why are you speaking of investing?" I ask. "I was merely speaking metap...
Post a Comment
Read more

Nessie the Lonely Monster

I wonder if the Lockness monster ever gets lonely. You find it prowling the deep keeping all to itself. At the depths that it swims around in, it can hardly have an active social life. Few creatures would take a deep breath and go down contentedly into the murky depths. Life can also be like that. There may be hundreds of creatures swimming around in the pool that is everyday life, but some find themselves always alone. Early in life I found that I lacked the joie de vivre when others were around. I would rather curl up with a story book. Playing football or such energetic games were I found not my cup of tea. I did like playing hide and seek, but those days when I enjoyed it were all too short. Since I disliked the rough and tumble of life, I grew a shell like a mollusc. Gastropods, I believe they call them.  But what it is in a name, I thought as the exterior hardened. School life, with a principal with bulging eyes and a swift cane that he employed in keepin...
Post a Comment
Read more

Sundays

There was a time when I waited for Sunday. After a week of work, and I worked hard, a day of rest  was very welcome. I loved to sleep.  I am not an atheist, and I go to church maybe once a year for  midnight mass on Christmas eve. So I'm not a churchgoer basically. Therefore Sundays did not mean  that I was seated in the pews in church listening to the pastor's sermon.  The pastor, in fact,  would not recognise me until my sister, who goes more often to church, introduced me as her brother  after Christmas Eve mass. I also had a problem sleeping and would lie awake at nights trying desperately trying to fall asleep. I tried counting sheep and it never worked. I also tried those sleeping videos on YouTube. I listened  \ and felt bored. They were not music I was familiar with and they kept my eyelids firmly apart. Even a safe  tranquillizer that my doctor prescribed did not have any effect. The on...
Post a Comment
Read more